Since I made no blog post on Monday, I decided to post-pone that post for today. All month, I’ve been writing on the topical discussion of love. I’ll also have some bonus content this Friday reviewing my most recent Influenster VoxBox. When you subscribe to my blog, you’ll get email alerts every time I post. I don’t have any email campaign’s because I don’t 100% agree with spamming someone’s email box.
Today’s post will be about communication as a suggestion from a friend. This can be about communication between friends, coworkers, and working with people. If you enjoy astrology, the pre-shadow period of Mercury Retrograde has begun.
Let’s start communicating, shall we?
What annoys me
I’ve always been one to text several times throughout the week to double check plans made with people here .I used to not be so direct but over the past two years, I’ve noticed that people here in Oklahoma don’t always stick to their word. Being from Texas plays a minor part of it. There’s a thing called planning and knowing your calendar. To make communication more open, let those you know that if you have to postpone an event let them know more than 24 hours in advance. Sometimes, snow days can cancel events like going to work or school. This happened yesterday, and my boss gave us about 19 hours heads up that the local school district had canceled and that our school would be closed as well. She sent the text about 8 pm last night just minutes after the school district we work alongside sent out phone calls that tomorrow will be a snow day.
I have learned to forgive people about their continuous cancellations. I have one friend I’ve known for two years and the reasons she’s canceled is almost always the same. I’ve learned not to get my hopes up because something always has a tendency to get in the way. Since November, I’ve told myself to back-off for making plans and wait for her to initiate girls night.
Communication Within Relationships
For someone who hasn’t spent a lot of time in relationships, the only thing I have to comment on in this section is about the ability to being open about what you are trying to accomplish. I view life in a series of goals and such. I don’t work well with surprises so I’ve always suggested telling me to block out time for a thing that we are doing so I can book the time to attend the fake event. For example, if you are trying to make a surprise party tell me to leave time out for going out to eat. Works every time.
This is where trust and honesty relate to each other. At times, you have to plainly state what exactly you want accomplished at certain times. Monday evening after a work meeting, a coworker and I went out to eat. We were at the restaurant for almost two hours and we continued to chat as we took our conversation to Target and then we were sitting in her car trying to wrap up the conversation for another two hours. I hadn’t chatted about random stuff with friends since November so that five hours helped me sort through stuff.
I bring that example up, because both of us didn’t want to go home and work on to-do lists. I haven’t just wasted hours away like that in several months. I used to do that all the time as a procrastination technique and so I’m going to have to work on my procrastination skills so that I’m not taking hours away from mine or someone’s day.
For example, let’s say you want the dishes done while you are out grocery shopping. But for whatever reason, the person you asked to do dishes wants to do something else. I was like this as a kid, so my family would also give barriers to the task. When you complete the dishes, you can go do ____.
Notice how I worded it as “when” and not “IF.” The words and tone you use to communicate determines lots of factors. How serious will they take your request?
How will they respond?
I’ve managed to capitalize on the difference between if & when while working with my kindergarten children. This has made some improvements on how kids respond to bad behaviors and such. Here’s an example:
A kid acts up and refuses to get in line to move to another classroom.
Scenario one: “If you want your toy back, you’ll have to step back into line.”
Scenario two: “When you get into line, you’ll get your toy back.”
I realized I wasn’t a fan of using if because that gave the child more power to decide to misbehave. Same could be argued for saying when, but it seems to give hem an option and a view on what will happen WHEN (not IF) the start listening to teachers orders.
Thanks for reading today’s post on communication. It’s not too much focus on love, but it does go hand-in-hand with love. I hope you enjoy this last weekend of February; as a gardener, I”m excited for the arrival of spring!